Not Dead Yet
by FicsOnFridays6
Summary: What if Newt didn't die when Thomas shot him? What if he was alive and no longer had the flare out of the blue? What happens to all of the bottled up feelings that they'd been hiding? Newtmas.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so I think that since I really ship newtmas(newt and tommy, gay), I should right a fanfic for them, since I legit cried when Newtie died. I legit cried and then threw the book. Don't get mad at me Audrey…(Audlong123) Lol! ;) So, I thought...what if he didn't die? If you don't like boy/boy, please leave, no hate. Now if you're still with me, enjoy!**

 **~Sara**

 ***All rights to James Dashner***

 **(A/N This first part is directly quoted from Maze Runner:The Death Cure. Italicized is my own words.)**

"Newt, come with me this time, right now. We can take you somewhere safer, somewhere better too…"

Newt laughed, and when he did his head twitched strangely a couple of times. "Get out of here Tommy. Get away." _Thomas' heart broke into a million pieces as he stared at Newt, his best friend._

"Just come with me," Thomas begged. "I'll tie you up if it makes you feel better."

Newt's face suddenly hardened into anger and his words shot out in a rage. "Just shut up, you shuck traitor! Didn't you read my note? You can't do one last, lousy thing for me? Gotta be the hero, like always? I hate you! I've always hated you!"

 _He doesn't mean it, he...can't._ Thomas told himself firmly. They were just words. "Newt…"

"It was all your fault! You could've stopped them when the first creators died. You could've figured out a way. But no! You had to keep it going, try to save the world, be the hero. And you came to the Maze and never stopped. All you care about is yourself! Admit it! Gotta be the one people remember, the one people worship! We should've thrown you down the Box hole!" _Thomas' heart broke at every word Newt said._

"Newt's face had colored to a deep red, and spit flew from his mouth as he yelled. He started taking lumbering steps forward, his hands balled into fists.

"I'm gonna blast him!" Lawrence yelled from the Van. **(A/N my heart started to break here, sorry this whole directly from the book thing is SO long!")** "Get out of the way!"

Thomas turned, _his heart in pain seeing Newt like this._ "Don't! It's just me and him! Don't do anything, _please!_ " He faced Newt again. "Newt, stop. Just listen to me. I know you're okay in there. Enough to hear me out."

"I hate you Tommy!" He was only a few feet away and Thomas took a step backwards, his hurt over Newt turning to fear. "I hate you I hate you I hate you! After all I did for you, after all the freaking klunk I went through in the bloody Maze, you can't do the one and only thing I've ever asked you to do! I can't even look at your ugly shuck face!"

Thomas took two more steps back. "Newt, you need to stop. They're going to shoot you. _Please, just do it for me if you can't do it for you._ Give me a chance!" He couldn't kill his _best_ friend. He just couldn't.

Newt screamed and rushed forward. An arc of Launcher lightning shot from the van, skidding and crackling across the pavement, but it missed him. He struggled to fill his lungs as his old friend climbed on top of him and pinned him down.

"I should rip your eyes out," Newt said, spraying Thomas with spit. "Teach you a lesson in stupidity. Why'd you come over here? You expected a bloody hug? Huh? A nice sit-down to talk about the good times in the Glade?"

Thomas shook his head, gripped by terror, very slowly reaching for his gun with his free hand.

 **(A/N My fucking heart shattered right here.)** "You wanna know why I have this limp, Tommy? Did I ever tell you? No, I don't think I did."

"What happened?" Thomas asked, stalling for time. He slipped his fingers around the weapon, _not believing what he was about to do._

"I tried to kill myself in the Maze. Climbed halfway up one of those bloody walks and jumped right off. Alby found me and dragged me back to the Glade right before the door closed. I hated that place, Tommy. I hated every second of every day. And it was all...your...fault!" _Newt…_ _Thomas thought._

Newt suddenly twisted around and grabbed Thomas by the hand holding the gun. He yanked it toward himself, forcing it up until the end of the pistol was pressed against his own forehead. _No, Newt! Thomas thought._ "Now make amends! Kill me before I become one of those _bloody_ cannibal monsters! Kill me! I trusted you with the note! No one else. Now do it!"

Thomas _tried to yank_ his hand away, but Newt was too strong. "I can't, Newt, I can't."

"Make amends! Repent for what you did!" The words tore out of him, his whole body trembling. _I don't like seeing you this way, Thomas thought._ Then his voice dropped to an urgent, harsh whisper. "Kill me, you shuck coward. Prove you can do the right thing. Put me out of my misery."

The words horrified Thomas. "Newt, maybe we can—"

"Shut up! Just shut the _bloody hell_ up! I trusted you! Now do it!"

"I can't."

"Do it!"

"I can't!" How could Newt ask him to do something like this? How could he possibly kill one of his best friends?

"Kill me or I'll kill you. Kill me! Do it!"

"Newt…"

"Do it before I become one of them!"

"I…"

"KILL ME!" And then Newt's eyes cleared, as if he'd gained one last trembling gasp of sanity, and his voice softened, _just a little._ "Please, Tommy. Please."

With his heart falling into a black abyss, Thomas pulled the trigger. **(Why, James Dashner? Why?! WHY?!)**

Thomas had closed his eyes when he did it. He heard the impact of bullet on the flesh and bone, felt Newt's body jerk, then fall onto the street. Thomas twisted onto his stomach, then pushed himself to his feet, and he didn't open his eyes until he started running. He couldn't allow himself to see what he'd done to his _best_ friend. The horror of it, the sorrow and the guilt and sickness of it all, threatened to consume him, filled his eyes with tears as he ran toward the white van.

"Get in!" Lawrence yelled at him.

The door was still open. Thomas jumped through it and pulled it shut. Then the van was moving. No one spoke. Thomas stared out of the front window in a daze. He'd shot his best friend in the _heart._ **(This is necessary for the plot, guys.)** Never mind that it was what he'd been asked to dim what Newt had wanted, what he'd pleaded for. _But_ Thomas had still pulled the trigger. He looked down, saw that his hands and legs were shaking _in the horror of what he'd done,_ and he suddenly felt freezing cold.

"What have I done?" He mumbled, but the others didn't say a word. **(End of directly quoted part, remember that only the plot is mine, and only the italicized part in the top is mine. All rights to James Dashner.)**

 **Thomas POV**

So many thoughts ran through my head. Why. Why. Why? Why did I have to kill him? I missed him so much. His eyes, his hair, his accent, his everything. I missed him so much.

"Hey, Tom? Are you okay? Do you want to talk?" Brenda asked, putting her arm around me.

"No, Brenda. Please, get away from me." I saw a look of hurt flash across her face. I took in a deep breath. "Please, Brenda. Just...please." She slowly got up and walked away. My whole world was crumbling.

 ***trigger warning, self harm*** I walked away from our camp to inside the woods. I knew I shouldn't. I knew how disappointed Newt would have been. But-I couldn't help myself. Nobody would care about what I did to myself anyway. There was nothing worth living for. I was so...sad. I pulled out a small, thin knife, then dragged it across my skin, cutting a little, just a little, open. I sighed. Life wasn't worth living anymore.

 _Newt is dead_. One cut. _Half of the people we started out with are dead._ Another cut. _I killed him._ A third cut. _My best friend is dead._ Fourth. A footstep behind me stopped it. I quickly hid the knife and covered up the four parallel cuts on my wrist.

"Get away from me." I muttered.

"It's just me. Brenda." Brenda said.

"What do you want?"

"Tommy, stop it. It isn't your fault. None of this was."

"Don't call me that." I yelled, slamming my fist on the ground.

"What is that?!" Brenda gasped, grabbing my wrist.

I wrestled myself out of her grip. "Brenda. Stop. You're not helping. Sometimes I wish I had never met you."

The look on her face was awful. "I-I'm Sorry." I tried to say, but she was already gone. Then everything was black.

 _Flashback_

" _Shouldn't someone give a pep talk?" Minho asked, pulling Thomas's attention away from Alby._

" _Go ahead," Newt replied._

 _Minho nodded and faced the crowd. "Be careful," he said dryly, "Don't die."_

 _Thomas would have laughed if he could, but he was too scared for it to come out._

" _Great. We're all bloody inspired," Newt answered then pointed over his shoulder toward the Maze, "You all know the plan. After two years of being treated like mice, tonight we're making a stand. Tonight we're taking the fight back to the creators, no matter what we have to go through to get there. Tonight the Grievers better be scared."_

Thomas's visión slowly melted away into reality.

Tears flowed down Thomas's face, and Thomas crouched down, not wanting to get up.

 **Newt POV**

"Tommy?" I muttered. There was so much pain around my chest. I slowly opened my eyes to the horror of what happened to my body. There was so much blood. The only good thing was that my brain...felt normal again. I was the normal me, and that's all that mattered.

I got up, checking my surroundings. Then I remembered everything. Everything I did. It all started with the note. _Kill me. If you've ever been my friend, kill me._ That's what I wrote. I remembered.

" _Shut up! Just shut the bloody hell up! I trusted you! Now do it!"_

" _I can't."_

" _Do it!"_

" _I can't!" How dare he not listen to anything I said._

" _Kill me or I'll kill you. Kill me! Do it!" I cried.._

" _Newt…"_

" _Do it before I become one of them!"_

" _I…"_

" _KILL ME!" And then my eyes cleared, as if I had gained one last trembling gasp of sanity, and I tried to soften my voice. "Please, Tommy. Please."_

 _Thomas pulled the trigger._

"Tommy…" I whispered. He must have left me for dead. I had to find him. I got up, using every last bit of my energy to move. _Thomas,_ I thought, _Wherever you are, no matter what happens, I promise, Tommy. I will find you._

 **There, the first chapter. Did you guys like it? Favorite, follow and Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi guys! I haven't update in over a month...I'm really sorry, and I promise there'll be more frequent updates from now on! Thanks for all the kind reviews, follows and favorites! I really appreciate it all!**

 **Tivae: I'm not sure if you're reading this, but thanks for the advice, and I really hadn't considered the fact that there's only a 10 percent chance of surviving a shot to the head, and even then he would be in a unfit state to go find Thomas...I promise there's some sort of an explanation in this chapter!**

 **Audlong123: Hey Audrey! LOL**

 **0-0: Thanks and sorry for the long wait!**

 **The Black Hearted Demon: Thanks for pointing out the fact that I directly quoted in the last chapter! I hope you didn't mind the wait!**

 **Thanks to everyone else who clicked the follow or favorite button!**

 **~Sara**

Thomas' POV

 _"_ _I tried to kill myself in the Maze. Climbed halfway up one of those bloody walks and jumped right off. Alby found me and dragged me back to the Glade right before the door closed. I hated that place, Tommy. I hated every second of every day. And it was all...your...fault!"_

Thomas couldn't forget anything that had happened the day he had killed Newt. and Teresa had died as well. But nothing was worse than the fact that he had killed his best friend. His _best_ friend. Why? He could've done so many other things. He could've tied him up, he could've shot him somewhere other then the head...everything was cold and dark. Thomas was alone. Scared. Heartbroken. Grieving.

"Thomas?" Thomas heard a voice. He looked up and saw Newt.

"No...you're dead." He said, shaking his head.

"Thomas? Thomas, are you okay dude?" Newt was shaking his shoulders. Thomas realized had completely lost all sense of reality.

"Newt? Newt?" Thomas called through the dark mist in which Newt was standing in. He didn't understand.

"No, Thomas. It's Minho...can't you see me? Man, you're going insane. It's Minho, not Newt." Newt said. Now Thomas was utterly confused. Why was Newt standing in black mist, all while saying he was Minho?

Thomas looked away and curled up into a ball as he clutched his head. "Make it go away. Just make it go away!" He shouted, tears falling down his face. "Please, make him go away. Stop torturing me like this! Make it all go away. Please, please!"

"Thomas, you gotta listen to me. Whatever you're seeing, whatever you're hearing, there's nothing actually here. Just me and you, in the woods. Thomas, you have to remember who you are. We need you to be okay. If you can't do it for yourself, do it for all the other immune who are counting on you." Newt said, his voice slowly changing into Minho's. "We needs you. We all need you." Newt's face changed into Minho's as reality raced back into Thomas's mind.

"Minho? Oh my god, Minho." Thomas stared crying. "I saw Newt...he was talking, saying things to me."

"Thomas, that wasn't real." Minho told Thomas. "Thomas...Newt's dead. He's gone. Forever."

"Because of me!" Thomas screamed as sunk his nails into his skin. "I shot a bullet into his skull, Minho. I could've saved him, if I hadn't pulled the trigger!"

"Thomas, LISTEN TO ME!" Minho grabbed his arm. "There was nothing you could do, he's dead, and he's never coming back! Now you need to pull yourself back together before you fall apart completely. It's harder to put yourself back together after you've completely lost it then to just suck it up. He's gone and nothing's going to change it, alright?"

Thomas nodded, but on the inside, he was dying. You know what people say. Once a heart is broken, it'll never come back together in the same way.

Newt's POV

 **(A\N So, Thomas POV is third person, but Newt is first.)** While I gathered all my thoughts, I started to wonder...how the bloody hell did I survive a gun shot to the head? How was it completely healed? What happened to the flare? Was I immune now all of a sudden? I knew that the rate of surviving a shot to the head was 90 percent...it was almost impossible. Had Tommy somehow... missed? **(A/N It said in the book that he closed his eyes. Don't believe me? Look at the book.)** He had closed his eyes, right? But I felt it. Right in the center of my head. But there was nothing there. No flare, no wound, no Tommy.

There was no way I could've survived that gunshot, and even if I did, I wouldn't be able to do anything. I shouldn't be able to speak or move...but I could. I knew everything that was going on. Had WICKED done something to me? But that was unlikely. Well, right now, everything was impossible. Which meant anything could be possible. Hell, I could've even come back from the dead! One thing was for sure. If I was alive, so was Tommy, which meant I could find him and everyone else.

Thomas's POV

Minho led the way to what seemed like a better constructed version of the glade.

Minho suddenly smiled and said, "Hey, greenie. Welcome to the Glade."

"I told you I'm not new anymore. It feels like ages since the glade days. No flare, no WICKED, less craziness..." Thomas sighed. He had to move on from all of it. Death. WICKED. The flare. It seemed like years had passed from when all he was worried about was getting out of the maze. But right now, he would give anything to be back in there, safe from everything in the actual world, with no memories except his name.

"Jeez, Thomas. I was just joking. Lighten up a little...no, I mean a lot." Minho said.

"Sorry...it just all struck me that so much happened in such little time. It's just a little hard for my mind to take."

Minho smiles sympathetically at Thomas. "Guess what, shank?"

"What?"

"You've been voted as leader."

"What?"

"YOU'VE BEEN VOTED AS LEADER!"

"That's not what I meant you shank!" Thomas cried, a slight smile popping up on his face.

"Hey! There's a smile!" Minho said and Thomas frowned, the smile fading. "So, I guess you'd better start leading."

"Fine." Thomas said, still frowning, but laughter started flowing through his lips, causing him to snort. Minho smiled.

"What? I there something wrong with me laughing?" Thomas asked.

"No...it's just that I've only seen you laugh a couple times."

"And what's wrong with that?"

"They were all with Newt." A pang of grief struck Thomas but he knew that he couldn't give into the grief. For everyone counting on him.

"Don't, Minho. Just don't." Thomas said.

"Alright. I'll leave you to your leadership crap." Minho said as he left Thomas alone again in the middle of camp.

Thomas sighed. He had to keep being positive, because if he let the negative side of him take over, that would be the end for him. Insanity would consume him, and there would be none of the original Thomas left inside him.

Newt's POV

It was getting close to nightfall and I still hadn't found any sign of where Tommy might have went after "killing" me. Right now there were two things that I needed to know. How the hell I had survived a shot to the head and the flare.. and where Thomas and all the other bloody people went. Okay, now I feel repetitive.

"Where would Tommy and everyone else go after killing me?" I thought deeply, but nothing came to mind. "What if they were still looking for the cure to the flare? But what if they found it? And what if everyone on earth was dead except for the immunes?" I said to myself. There was nobody around to be seen, and there wasn't a single voice anywhere. Everyone on Earth might as well be dead. I sighed deeply, looking for anything, anything.

That's when it hit me. "Oh my god! I am so stupid!" I said to myself. I hadn't even noticed the tire tracks right in front of me, leading on and on into the woods. I knew which direction to go, but first I needed rest.

Thomas's POV

Thomas drifted off to sleep, tired from the day. "Tommy?" A familiar voice called. He stirred awake and saw Newt. Again.

"Newt? You're alive?" He cried.

Newt shook his head. "No, Tommy. I'm dead. You killed me, remember? You pulled the trigger."

"Newt? Newt, please. I'm sorry!"

"Tommy, it was all your fault." Newt gestures toward his hands as a gun appeared in them, and his hands went up, ready to pull the trigger. He couldn't control his body.

"No. No..." Thomas cried as his fingers pulled the trigger over and over again, replaying Newt's death over and over as Thomas begged for his mind to stop.

"Please! Make it stop!"

"I trusted you, Tommy." Newt said as he then took the gun straight from Thomas's hands and held the gun to his head. "Do it, Tommy. You didn't hesitate before. Do it. Kill me."

"Stop it! Stop it, just stop it! Stop messing with my mind! You're dead, you're gone. So just stop it!" Thomas cried, curling back into a ball and pounding his fists on his head.

"But Tommy. You have to remember why you killed me in the first place. Why you pulled that trigger. Why you set me free and peaceful."

"Because you asked me to."

"No, Tommy. I won't stop until you realize why. Now sleep. I'll come see you again."

"What do you mean why I pulled the trigger? I care about you! I regret my decision!" Thomas screamed.

"Then why Tommy? Why did you do it?" Newt's voice thundered.

"Stop torturing me!" Thomas screamed as he jolted out of bed. "Stop, Stop, Stop..." Thomas murmured as he rocked himself to sleep, tears falling, but never drying


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! So I know that I promised a regular update schedule, but it's actually really tough for me right now. Well, enjoy this chapter! Thanks for all the favorites and stuff!**

 **~Sara**

 **Thomas's POV**

Thomas felt bombarded because everyone was looking up to him now. At times, he felt tempted to step down as the leader, but he knew that people counted on him to keep hope, and if he gave up, everyone else would lose hope. He couldn't let that happen. If he had to sacrifice his own happiness, it didn't matter.

As he walked around, he saw that Sonya was walking up to him.

"Thomas! Oh my god I've been looking for you! Where have you been, you shank?" Sonya asked, giving him a quick hug.

"Just..thinking." He replies as he looked into the distance.

"It's just..you're not acting like yourself, Thomas." Sonya took a deep breath in. "I know that a lot has been going on-" _Yeah, Sonya. I killed my best friend._ Thomas thought to himself. "I know it's a lot to ask of you, but for everyone else's sake, can you please try to be happy?"

"You think I haven't tried to be happy, Sonya? Don't you know that this is the best I can do? I smile, I greet everyone, I try to help people! Does it matter what I'm feeling or whether or not I'm happy as long as everybody else is happy?" Thomas said. "You know what? You probably don't understand." He sighed.

"I'll try." He lied, not wanting to argue with her.

"Alright." She gave him a quick smile and patted his shoulder. "Things will get better, Thomas. I promise." _Yeah, right._

Thomas nodded and gestured for her to leave. He slumped back down into the small corner of the room that he was sitting in, and tried to calm himself down-

"Hey, Thomas. You need to get your bit out I that corner and take a look at this."

Thomas sighed for way seemed like the hundredth time that day. "Coming." He ran out through the fields of the camp, watching as everyone was running outside where Minho was going as well.

"Way is it?!" Thomas shouted across the field.

"Thomas. It's a man, and he's barely breathing. We need to get him into camp. Like, right now." Sonya said.

 **Newt's POV(The weird first person POV cause I'm weird.)**

It felt like I had been walking for years before I actually saw the camp. It was a camp. Of all the gladers and girls from Group B. I started quickening my pace, ignoring how hazy my vision started to get.

 _Please,_ I thought. _Let me at least make it there._

I used the last bits of my strength until my feet stopped working. I was only a couple yards away from the...entrance? I didn't know what it was, because my vision was so blurry and I was so tired.

I didn't care that my face was covered in sweat, dried blood, and mud. I just had to get there. I had to.

I lifted up my hands and started pulling myself towards the entrance to the camp. I kept going, reminding myself that if someone found me, I would be back with my friends. My family!

At last, when I finally got to the entrance, I felt so happy that I could almost stand...I collapsed, and my vision faded to black.

 **Thomas's POV**

Thomas's first thought was that the man was Newt. Obviously, the height was really similar, as was the hair, but Newt was dead. He had been dead for weeks. _By maybe..._ No. he couldn't go there. He couldn't give himself hope that Newt was still alive just to find out that he was dead again, and go back to that dark place.

"Thomas?" A voice drew him back into reality.

"Huh?" He mumbled.

"You've been staring into space for like 10 minutes." Sonya said. "You should really get some sleep." A concerned look crossed her face.

Thomas felt a quick flash of anger. "Look, Sonya, I don't need to be babied! I-"

He stopped, shocked at what he heard in his...mind.

" _Stop this, Tommy. You don't want Sonya to be angry at you too, do you?"_ Thomas stood there for a couple seconds. _I'm going crazy. I'm actually going nuts!_ He thought to himself.

"Thomas?" Sonya glared at him.

He took a deep breath. "You know what?" He paused. "I think I've been pushing myself too hard for the past few days. Maybe I should get some rest."

Sonya smiled. What he had said about pushing himself too hard was true, but that was how he kept going and don't give up. If he were to relax, even for a moment, the nightmares and visions would come. Teresa would hunt him in his dreams, and most of all Newt would terrorize him, and make him remember killing him, no matter how hard he tried to forget.

There was only one thing he was wishing for right now: _Please. No more nightmares. Please._ Sadly, he didn't have any luck whatsoever.

 **Newt's POV**

Pain. Everything I felt was pain. I tried to open my eyes but all I saw was blackness.

"Relax. We're going to help you." A voice said.

"P-please." I managed to croak out. More pain came along with that as I felt knives cutting through my leg and I shouted in agony. I couldn't get a wink of sleep.

Thomas's POV

As soon as I closed my eyes I had a nightmare. More like Newtmare.

 _"Make amends! Repent for what you did!" The words tore out of him, his whole body trembling. Then his voice dropped to an urgent, harsh whisper. "Kill me, you shuck coward. Prove you can do the right thing. Put me out of my misery."_

 _The words horrified Thomas. "Newt, maybe we can—"_

 _"Shut up! Just shut the bloody hell up! I trusted you! Now do it!"_

 _"I can't."_

 _"Do it!"_

 _"I can't!" How could Newt ask him to do something like this? How could he possibly kill one of his best friends?_

 _"Kill me or I'll kill you. Kill me! Do it!"_

 _"Newt…"_

 _"Do it before I become one of them!"_

 _"I…"_

 _"KILL ME!" And then Newt's eyes cleared, as if he'd gained one last trembling gasp of sanity, and his voice softened, just a little. "Please, Tommy. Please."_

 _With his heart falling into a black abyss, Thomas pulled the trigger._ Again and again, over and ove _r._ Then the vision shifted.

"Do it, Tommy. Do it." The same gun appeared back in Thomas's hand.

Newt took his hand and lead to his forehead. "C'mon, Tommy. Do it."

"I can't!" Thomas cried. "I can't kill you again!"

"Why not, Tommy? You already have!" Newt reasoned as he took the gun from his hand. "If you won't do it, I'll do it myself." He pointed the gun at himself, breaking Thomas's heart a million times.

"No!" Thomas grabbed the gun. "You can't!"

"Then why, Tommy? Why did you do it?" Newt took the gun back. "Give me a good reason."

"Please, Newt. Please don't make me do this." Newt handed Thomas the gun.

"Do it or give me an answer." Newt threatened, putting his hands around the gun. "Now do it."

"I did it because I care about you and I don't want you to suffer. You're my best friend, Newt. Please. Don't do it. Don't make me, not again!" Thomas cried, his hands trembling around the gun.

"Liar! You don't care. Nobody does." Newt's voice softened. "Nobody."

"No, Newt." Thomas dropped the gun. "I care about you. If I didn't I wouldn't have pulled the trigger. I..." He realized that that wouldn't be enough to stop him. He couldn't bear seeing him die over and over again. But why did he care so much? Why not Teresa? He had accepted the fact that Teresa was dead..but somehow Newt never went away from his mind. But why? Why? Why? His trembling hands moved to his head as he tried to think of the reason why..

"Well?" Newt questioned, handing him the gun from off the floor.

Then the answer flashed in his mind. But...it was impossible. Newt gestures towards the gun and started pulling the trigger.

"Wait! No, Newt! I know why I did it!"

"Then why? You probably just felt guilty for me. Because nobody cares about me. That's why it's better that I am dead. I don't even know why I've been waiting so long. I'm done." He pulled the trigger.

But it didn't kill him, because Thomas had taken the gun and snapped it in half.

He stared in shock at what he'd done. He dropped the shards of the broken gun, his hands shaking uncontrollably now. "Look, Newt. Don't take this the wrong way but...Newt, I love-"

He jumped out of bed, his hands trembling. He stopped, looking around the room, looking for any sign that he was still in his nightmare. He wanted to die right then and there. _What was wrong with him? Why would he say that?_ It didn't matter. He didn't get to finish. And that was that.

"Thomas? Wake up! The man is awake!" Minho called.

Thomas flung himself out of bed and scrambled towards where Minho was. "Really? Where is he? Is he okay?"

"He's stable." Minho said. "Do you want to see him?"

"Obviously." Thomas said.

"He's in that tent over there." Minho pointed towards a small tent.

Thomas nodded and then started jogging over. _Why was he so worried? There wasn't anything special about him.._ Thomas stopped worrying because he was right in front of the tent. He walked inside and opened the door, only then he realized.

"Tommy?" The man asked.

"Newt?"

 **Sorry for the stupid cliffhanger. Anyway, favorite, follow and review!**

 **~Sara**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi, so I'm hoping that I'll be able to keep up with a regular updating schedule from now on. Enjoy and thank you to all the people who recently followed, favorited or reviewed. Thanks to AliVader24 for suggesting this first part!**

 **~Sarjoo06**

* * *

"Tommy?"

"Newt?" Thomas gasped and then ran over to the bed and then he realized...what if this was all another nightmare and he was just wishing that Newt was alive. He knew it. This wasn't real. He stopped dead in his tracks and looked around for any sign that this was a nightmare. But then again, every time he had a nightmare, he always thinks it's real. "No. You're not real. You're not real. I'm just hallucinating. You're just some random guy that I keep thinking is Newt."

"Tommy, what do you mean not real? I'm real, Tommy." Newt said in a soft, raspy voice.

"That's what you always say! And then you make me kill you, over and over and over until I can't think straight anymore and that's why I'm going insane! I want this to all end! I don't deserve life...I'm responsible for ending so many lives. So many lives." Thomas shook his head.

"That's not true, Tommy. You deserve your life. You shouldn't end it. You had to do everything you did protect the people you care about." Newt struggled to get out of his bed.

Thomas didn't stop as he grabbed the operating knife and started to slowly cut his skin, sighing in relief as the cool blade cut through him, making him bleed his problems away, for a short while.

"What the hell are you doing, Tommy?" Newt took the knife from him.

"Stop it. You're not real!" Thomas screamed as he grabbed for the knife.

"Look, Tommy. You better get the bloody hell up and pull yourself together." Newt gave him a deathly stare. "I am not dead. I am alive. I do not have the flare, and I am fine. You are not insane, because I'm right here. Maybe you did have nightmares, but this isn't one of them. I promise."

Thomas didn't believe him. He took the knife while Newt let his guard down. "Shut up." He whispered as he started again, this time cutting his skin even deeper.

"Oh get a grip Tommy. I am fucking real. What do you bloody want for me to prove it?" Newt shouted.

'Do something! You haven't touched me once!" Thomas said. "That's how I know you're either fake or I'm hallucinating!" he shouted. "And I can't take the pain anymore. I'm sorry." His voice cracked.

"Bloody hell, Thomas! I'm standing right in front of you, and I'm screaming at you. What sort of hallucination is that, you shank?" Newt yelled.

"It's the kind of hallucination that I've been having for weeks. I can't tell what's real anymore." Thomas said.

"Bloody hell." Newt mumbled as he grabbed both of Thomas's wrist and tied them with a rope. 'How's that, huh? Has that happened before?"

Thomas stopped. "Wait.." He looked around at everything. He saw no gun, newt wasn't taunting him about killing him...so why was he so paranoid? All the signs said that this was real! He was just...stupid.

"Tommy, look at me." Newt smiled softly. "Tommy, I'm alive."

Thomas hugged Newt tightly. "You're real? You're actually real? You're right here?"

"I told you, Tommy. I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere."

"I'm so sorry, Newt." Thomas sobbed. "I'm sorry about what I've become. I don't know why I've become such a mess. I don't..I can't...I'm a complete and utter failure. Every time I'm close to falling apart, I pull myself together, but every time I pull myself together, the more things start to fall apart. Don't get me started about how I'm the one crying when you're the one who just went through hours and hours of surgery."

"Oh, stop it. You said that you're a failure? You've been running this place ever since I 'died' and you've been kind to everyone for weeks! You're one of the most determined, kindest, most amazing people I know. Heck, you may as well be the best human being to exist! You're my best friend, Tommy. You're my best friend." Newt said.

Someone opened the door, causing both boys to spring apart. "Oh my god! Newt?! How the hell are you alive?" Minho cried.

"Um...it's a very very long story." Newt replied, laughing a little.

"At least now, little _Tommy_ here will stop whining about you." Minho laughed as Thomas threw Newt's pillow at him.

"Hey!" Minho cried as he smacked Thomas with the pillow and then stopped in front of Newt, unsure if he wanted to be hit. Newt took that as an advantage and took the pillow and smacked Minho. the boys were having fun for the first time in a really, really long time. And it felt amazing.

* * *

 **Two Hours Later...**

"So how did you end up alive?" Minho asked. "I thought you were dead."

"I woke up on the side of a road. Flare gone. No bullet anywhere. No blood." Newt said. "It's actually really weird."

"Maybe you were immune somehow." Thomas thought out loud. "I mean, they said you weren't, but who survives the flare and a..bullet to the head?"

"I don't think so." Newt said. "Maybe WICKED decided to do something to me."

Thomas felt a stab of guilt and pain flow through his body. "Let's change the subject."

"Did we forget to tell everybody else that Newt is still alive?" Minho said.

"Yeah, you forgot to tell people that I rose up from the dead." Newt laughed and pretended to be a zombie.

Thomas felt that stab of guilt and pain again. How could Newt be so happy? How was he able to laugh after everything he'd been through? After his own best friend had shot a bullet into his skull. And then left him alone after he died, not even giving a thought about how maybe he wanted to be buried or something like that? Newt was his best friend, and yet Thomas still pulled the trigger. Deep down in his mind, he knew that no matter what, he would have ended up doing it. And he felt so, so guilty for it.

"Watcha thinking about?" Newt asked him.

"It's nothing." Thomas said as they neared the rest of the gladers, who were waiting for them.

"Is that newt?" "Oh my god, it's Newt!" "Newt's back!" They started to murmur.

Sonya pushed through the crowd and through her arms around a confused Newt.

"Newt, it's me. Sonya." Sonya said. "Don't you remember?"

"Remember what?" Newt asked, still confused.

Thomas suddenly remembered about how Group B had taken their memories, and they must've gotten them back by now. "Oh my god. Sonya, what do you know?" he asked her.

"Newt is my brother...I just can't remember his name." Sonya said. "I think he's my brother. He has to be."

* * *

 **Newt's POV(Finally!)**

"Newt is my brother...I just can't remember his name." Sonya said. "I think he's my brother. He has to be." In a flash I remembered everything. From saying goodbye to my little sister before I went into the maze, how I cried and she comforted me, and I told her that I should be the one comforting her.

"Lizzy?" I gasped in disbelief as I looked at her. Yes, she'd grown. A lot. She was no longer my adorable little sister who needed my help with everything. She was independent, strong, and kind.

"Yeah." Lizzy replied. **(I had to use so much Maze Runner Wiki but I couldn't find Newt's real name...and I could never call him something else. Sonya, I can handle.)**

"I can't remember my name." I said.

"I can only remember calling you Newt. My entire life." Lizzy replied.

"So...you guys are related?" Tommy asked me in disbelief. "I can see it now. In the hair, the eyes. Heck, you guys have the same laugh."

We both laughed. "So it's really you? Elizabeth? My baby sister?"

"Yeah. Except I'm not a baby anymore." She replied.

"But she's so much cooler than you!" Minho cried. "How are you guys related? She's mean and you're nice!"

"I can be nice." Sonya replied.

* * *

 **Thomas(Sorry, I like writing in Tommy's POV)**

"I can not believe you guys are actually related." Thomas gasped again. he couldn't believe how he hadn't noticed before. The way Sonya always seemed to have a solution to any problem, her kind words, the hair, the eyes, the laugh. No wonder he'd been spending so much time with Sonya after he thought Newt had died.

 **Later that night...(Sorry for all the time skips)**

"So, Tommy. What were you going to tell me last night before you woke up from this dream?" Newt asked, putting his hands on the gun again.

"It's nothing." Thomas said as he tried to hold in the pain. He knew he was going to wake up soon.

"Well..if it's nothing, you can tell me." He teased.

"Well, if it is nothing, I don't have to tell you." Thomas responded. It was the first time he had ever said something like that to his nightmare.

"Wrong choice." Newt said as he shot himself. Over and over again. He was torturing Thomas, over and over again with no mercy.

"Please, just stop it! Just stop it!" He cried as he tried desperately to wake himself up form this nightmare. Usually, he would be awake by now. But he wasn't.

"Tell me." Newt threatened, shooting himself again. "I'm not worthy of your trust. You shot me. You thought I was dead and gave up hope. You're a mess and a failure, Thomas."

"JUST STOP IT!" Thomas screamed.

* * *

 **Newt(I promise this will actually be interesting)**

"JUST STOP IT!" A familiar voice made me jolt out of my bed. "Please, make it stop!" The voice whimpered. I got out of bed and ran over to where Tommy was shouting, tossing and turning.

"I love you, alright?" he murmured in his sleep. I won't lie...I felt kind of...jealous. I can't explain why..forget that. Must've been Teresa.

"Stop! Stop it!" He started shouting again. It was unbearable to see him in pain like that. I shook him several times, and at last, he jolted awake.

"Newt?" Thomas face paled. "I'm still dreaming. I'm still dreaming."

"No, you're not." I said.

"How long were you listening?" He paled even more.

"I just heard you scream." I lied.

* * *

 **Thomas(I'm sorry for switching over and over and over!)**

Thomas had just told his nightmare that he was in love with Newt. And Newt may have been listening. He knew that he was listening. He knew what Newt looked like when he was lying about something.

If he had heard it, and he knew who it was...it could ruin our friendship. I can't explain why, or even how, but one thing's for sure.

I love Newt.

* * *

 **How was that?**

 **~Sara**


	5. Chapter 5(Edited Version, Please Read!

**So I just want to thank everyone for reviewing, following, and favoriting. I really appreciate every single one of you, and every single time I get a notification in the mail that someone favorited or reviewed, it brightens my day. Special thanks to Mad3line for making me happy on an awful day. Another thank you to Audlong123, who helped me figure out whether this chapter was good or not. Okay, I already posted this, but I added some more details, and I feel like this chapter is better, so please read.**

 ***All credits to James Dashner***

 **~Sara**

* * *

 **Newt's POV**

"You need to stop struggling, everything's going to be alright-"

"Pass me the scalpel and the scissors."

"Focus everyone, focus."

Newt opened his eyes and saw 3 doctors scurrying over his head. One was looking at a computer monitor and was looking at an x-ray of a skull with a bullet in it. Another doctor was looking worriedly for materials, and the last one was sitting right next to him.

"We have to remove the bullet, or he'll die." The one who was looking at his computer told the other two doctors. He typed something quickly into his computer. "But if we take it out, he might not be able to walk or speak again!"

The doctors huddled together and whispered to each other and seemed to make a decision.

"Are you sure that you want to go through with the operation?"

"If we don't, subject A.5 will die, and Thomas will not be even willing to come back to WiCKED for more samples of his brain and blood. We will all die, the human race will disappear if we don't do this!"

"Why wouldn't Thomas come back?"

"Have you seen the tapes? Thomas is devastated. Maybe if he has one thing that he needs and wants, he'll come back in hope that in can cure A.5 completely."

"I'm not familiar with this procedure, can you please explain it thoroughly to me?"

"Of course. We're just going to temporarily try to correct subject A.5's DNA to try and make him partly immune to the flare, because that's the only cure we have right now. But if Thomas sees that he's only going to be okay if we can find a cure, he will help us. The problem is, we have no idea how long the cure is going to last."

"How is Thomas going to know that it's the flare coming back?"

"He watched his best friend die of it before, of course he'll notice! Plus, we left a note in subject A.5's pocket."

"Then why not bring back Teresa?"

"It seems like most of his grief comes from killing his best friend, though I have no idea why he doesn't grieve Teresa."

"Were they not lovers?"

"For a short period of time…" The man muttered as he typed something into his computer, ready to start the procedure. "Relax, A.5. This isn't going to hurt, and when you wake up, you'll be back in the same spot."

I jumped awake, and looked around. I was in a bed. Where? I wondered. Then I remembered. Running, blacking out, and finally ending up here. I was back with my friends...and Thomas. I could finally be happy.

But I still felt...off. A pang went through my head as I remembered my dream. Was it true? But I couldn't tell Thomas about the dream if it were in fact real. If I did, Thomas would go to WICKED...or would he see the reason in staying? He definitely wouldn't risk his life for me. The pang came back, but this time it was real. A headache. I felt dread run through my veins as I realized..this was how I felt right before the flare got to me. It was true, no doubt. I had the flare again.

* * *

 **Thomas's POV**

Thomas opened the door to Newt's room. "Hey, Newt. How're you feeling?" He asked as he watched Newt stuff a crumpled note into his pocket.

"Bloody fantastic, Thomas. Bloody fantastic." he said sarcastically.

"Newt. What's wrong?" Thomas asked again in a worried tone. Was something bothering him?

"Nothing." His voice was back to normal, like nothing had ever happened.

"Oh...um..alright." he muttered.

"What was that?" Newt asked again in the same weird tone that he'd used.

"Nothing." Thomas said, a little bit shocked and scared. What had happened to him?

"What did you want to talk to me about?" The soft tone reappeared.

"Oh, I was just checking in to see how you were feeling." Thomas said."Is there something bothering you?"

Newt ushered for Thomas to sit next to him on the bed. "Well..I had this dream…" He muttered worriedly, like it had been on his mind for days.

"Tell me, Newt." Thomas said as he sat down.

"But-

Thomas glared at Newt, who finally agreed. "Well...some scientists took the flare out of me..temporarily."

"Temporarily? What's that supposed to mean?" Thomas questioned, furious at WICKED. "Why would they do that?"

"Relax, Tommy. It's just a dream." Newt said. "Anyways, they bloody said something about a note in my pocket, and how you had to go back to WICKED, blah blah blah. Like I said, Tommy. Just a dream."

Thomas sucked in a deep breath and told himself that it was just a dream, and that there was no note, and Newt didn't have the flare. But he couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. Newt at him, and Thomas got the message. _Don't worry._ "Alright. Just...let me know if something happens, alright?"

* * *

 **Newt's POV**

That was. so. bloody. close. Thomas hated WICKED. I couldn't make him do something like that for me, if we were going to. I was so happy that he didn't ask to look into my pocket. I had checked, right before he came to visit me.

 _Thomas,_

 _I know that you'll be reluctant to come back to WICKED, but the world needs you. If we don't get more samples of your blood and DNA, almost 100% of the world's population will be wiped out, leaving only the immunes left, and hardly any one of them are adults._

 _I know what you're thinking. That you won't come back to WICKED, that you won't no matter what we do, that we're despicable and cruel. But all we want is to protect what is left of the human civilization._

 _As...a gift, we have presented you subject A.5! Back and in great health...temporarily. If you haven't figured out that he has the flare again, well, he does. The only way that he'll get better is if we have the cure. Otherwise, he'll die._

 _I hope you make the right choice, Thomas. The world's fate, and A.5's fate, rests in your hands._

 _~WICKED_

I read the words again. I couldn't let anyone see it, no matter what. They would torture him and everyone else, they would terrorize several thousands of the people who are unaffected and affect them just to see if the cure Thomas's DNA created would work on them.

I couldn't let them be tortured, and I couldn't let anyone go through the flare as I did.

 **2 hrs later…**

"Newt? Are you in there? It's time for supper!" Lizzy called from outside the door. "Are you ready?"

I had been getting headaches every 30 minutes or so. It was moving to fast. I couldn't go to dinner. I couldn't, not if I wanted to convince Tommy that I was fine...but if I skipped that would make it worse. "Coming!" I called back over to her as I got up slowly and stumbled to the door. I waited for the headache to pass. I had around 30 minutes, and that would be enough time to eat and then head back.

Lizzy and I walked together to dinner, and I didn't predict anything that was happening…

* * *

 **Thomas's POV**

Thomas finally saw Newt show up at dinner with Lizzy. Something seemed off about Newt, but it was probably just the fact that Newt hadn't been out of his room all day.

Thomas waved Newt over to sit right next to him, and Newt anxiously sat down and immediately winced and put a hand to his head.

"Are you okay?" Thomas asked as soon as Newt winced. Newt was clearly still in pain because his eyes were glassy, but he simply nodded and fake-smiled.

Nothing else happened for the rest of the night until they finished eating and they both got up. Newt stumbled, and right as Thomas noticed that Newt was about to collapse, he fell over, causing panic to flow all through out the camp.

"Newt? Newt?" Thomas asked in fear. What could have possibly happened? He thought as other gladers took Newt away to care for him.

That's when he noticed the small piece of paper on the ground.

 _Thomas,_

 _I know that you'll be reluctant to come back to WICKED, but the world needs you. If we don't get more samples of your blood and DNA, almost 100% of the world's population will be wiped out, leaving only the immunes left, and hardly any one of them are adults._

 _I know what you're thinking. That you won't come back to WICKED, that you won't no matter what we do, that we're despicable and cruel. But all we want is to protect what is left of the human civilization._

 _As...a gift, we have presented you subject A.5! Back and in great health...temporarily. If you haven't figured out that he has the flare again, well, he does. The only way that he'll get better is if we have the cure. Otherwise, he'll die._

 _I hope you make the right choice, Thomas. The world's fate, and A.5's fate, rests in your hands._

 _~WICKED_

Newt lied to him. He lied. He lied, he lied, he lied. Thomas couldn't process the constant reminders of what he'd done to Newt before, and he felt guilty. So, so, guilty. Everything wasn't gonna be okay. Newt had the flare again.

Thomas had to keep it together, because he wasn't the one who's life was at stake. Newt was dying. Newt was dying, he was dying. Dying. Thomas's hand started to shake and he put his hand on it to try and settle it, and it settled. Briefly. As soon as he saw more medics rushing around, his other hand started shaking as well as the other one, uncontrollably. Thomas's vision started to blur as he sank to the floor.

 _No._ He told himself. _I can't be weak, I can't fall apart, not now. I can't!_ No matter how hard he tried, his mind and sanity started to shatter right before him, and reality fell into bits and pieces.

"Tommy!" A voice cried in pure agony. Thomas looked right next to him as a bed and a boy who was laying down in it showed up in the pitch black nothingness. "Tommy!" Newt cried again, his hands shaking as he thrashed around and he twitched in all sorts of ways. The agony in Newt's voice was enough to make Thomas want to die.

If Newt died, he wouldn't have anything, anyone left to live for. Nothing to fight for. Sure, he had friends and people who looked up to him…

He couldn't handle Newt dying in front of his eyes and then dying again because of his stupidity. He couldn't. He just couldn't.

He brought down his shaking hands from his eyes and held them in front of his face. They were trembling furiously. His hands kept shaking as he stood up. His whole body shook from the effort. He couldn't go into shock right now. Newt needed him. He tried to move, but his whole body felt weak. His 20/20 vision started to blur with dark spots, and everything went dark.

* * *

 **um...sorry?**


	6. Chapter 6! Happy Newt Day!

**Hi guys,**

 **I'm really sorry for not updating. I've been busy with school work and my new dog, and sports, so please don't get angry with me, and still read this fanfic. I noticed that there have been significantly less reviews, so I thought maybe you guys have been ignoring it or Fanfiction is being crappy.**

 **~Sara**

 **Thomas's POV**

Newt had finally gotten a little bit better, and was in an okay state of mind, which mean one thing.

He had to go talk to him.

He drew in one quick, harsh, breath and tried to make his hand open the door as it trembled. He questioned if this was a good idea. Newt had been lying to him, for who knows how long?

Newt told Thomas that everything was fine, that his dream meant nothing, that he felt no symptoms coming back!

Thomas took in a deep breath. If he didn't talk to Newt, he would never know. He exhaled and opened the door carefully and softly.

"Tommy?" A small but sweet voice asked from across the room.

There. Newt saw him, clear as the sky on a sunny day. "Thank god you're okay." Was the first thing Thomas said, as he watched Newt's features relax. He turned his head away from Newt.

"Tommy, I can explain."

"There is nothing to explain. You lied to me. You didn't think you could trust me." Thomas said, betrayal, guilt, and anger very evident in his voice.

"Thomas." Newt said in a stern, harsh tone that Thomas had never heard before.

Thomas turned and saw Newt, struggling to sit up.

"Sit back down first."

Newt sat down, knowing not to argue with Thomas. "I-I didn't want you to go back to WICKED."

"What do you mean? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT, NEWT?" Thomas almost screamed.

"They're lying, Thomas! Do you think they're just going to make a cure for the bloody flare? This is a joke, a bloody lie! I'm not letting you go!"

"I _want_ to go, Newt. I want them to make a shucking cure, alright?"

"So you just want to be the hero, like always, risking your bloody life? You're such a bloody idiot!"

"Newt." Thomas looked him dead in the eye. "I'm not doing this to be a hero." He muttered quickly.

"Then why, Tommy? Why are you such a shucking idiot!?"

Of course Thomas stopped talking. "Nothing." He mumbled.

 **Newt's POV**

"Nothing." Tommy muttered. I felt a surge of hate flow through me, and hate turned to hunger. I could smell his blood flowing through his veins, and his heart beating. I could see every single skin cell on his body, and it smelled so...delicious.

I shook of the feeling in fear that I would hurt Tommy. I withdrew my hand from his and drew it close to my chest.

"Get away from me, Tommy."

"What?" Tommy said in disbelief.

"I said, get out." He got up quickly in disbelief and closed the door. I immediately burst into tears. The flare was nearing an end. I wasn't human. I was dead. I was a hollow shell of what I used to be. I couldn't keep up the act of being all right anymore. Who cared if I died, right here, right now? If I died right now, then Tommy wouldn't have to go to WICKED.

I considered everything. If I died, I would be hurting people who depended on me, but then again, I'm not exactly fit to be second in command right now, or even talk to people. Tommy...he was so depressed when I died...he has to get through. If he tries hard enough, he'll forget all about me. I'm forgettable, and everyone else needs him to be strong. I had made up my mind. I hated myself enough already, and now, by dying, I would be hurting the people that I loved the most. But it didn't matter to me, not anymore.

I let the flare and all the darkness that came with it consume me, my human emotions flooding away, letting the monster take full control.

 **Thomas's POV**

Thomas understood fully about the consequences of spying on someone. But he couldn't shake off the feeling that something insane was about to happen. He watched through the door as Newt got a fierce and determined look on his face.

Newt layed down on the bed, and tied himself up with rope, just as Thomas had suggested back when he was about to kill Thomas. He seemed to be arguing with himself, not out loud, but inside his mind. He closed his eyes, as a peaceful look flooded towards his face, and Thomas smiled and looked down on the floor, thinking that Newt was just going to get some rest.

Thomas looked up and saw that Newt was twitching, his face in an odd shape. Thomas's veins flooded with fear as he realized what was happening before his eyes. The transformation. Newt was now one of The Gone. His eyes were crazed, his silky hair tangled as he struggled to get out of the rope.

To Thomas's shock, Newt started to bite through the rope, causing Thomas's brain to start functioning again. "Somebody! Somebody, help! It's Newt!" He called, and waited. Nobody came.

"We can't. There's some sort of Griever infestation over here!" Sonya's small voice ran through the speakers.

"Don't you care about your brother?!" Thomas almost shouted, the worry and the grief and all his guilt starting to come back.

"Everyone, including Newt will be in danger if we don't get rid of the Grievers!" Sonya said, her voice getting louder and quicker.

"But-

"Thomas, I need you to stay calm. I'll be right-AH!" Her voice caught as a piercing noise ran through the hall, and a small yelp came from Sonya. Thomas's eyes filled with horror as he realized what had just happened.

"I-I can't, I-don't-" Thomas started to mutter as his hands started to tremble again. He focused on Newt, trying not to think about the fact that he was the cause of Newt's sister's death. I opened the door and raced in, and looked around.

Newt was nowhere to be found until Thomas heard a small gurgling noise come from behind him. He screamed as he saw that Newt had escaped from the ropes that he had tied on himself. Thomas's heart hurt, and shattered back into trillions of pieces, each time he backed away from Newt, a piece of his heart broke beyond repair.

"Newt." Thomas said. "Newt-I" His voice caught. He didn't have time to say anything else, because Newt ran into him, reaching to bite into his skin.

"I have to go to WICKED." Thomas muttered. "If I don't, Newt-Newt will die." He thought about how broken, and how much of a disaster he was until Newt came back. He couldn't handle not having Newt in his life. Not the worried, sad, and scared Newt, but the one he had met in the Maze.

Calm, sweet, nice, and compassionate. He started crying as he knocked Newt out, tied Newt up, and opened the closet, preparing to throw him in. But he couldn't just leave, knowing that he might die.

Thomas took a deep breath, leaned in slowly, and kissed Newt. It was short but sweet, sad yet hopeful, scared and determined. Thomas wanted to kiss him again, but he knew that if he did it again, Newt could wake up and try to kill him again, and he couldn't handle that.

With his heart falling into a dark abyss, much like it did when he had shot the trigger, Thomas kissed Newt one last time, and left.

 **Hi guys! In honor of Newt Day, I decided to publish this chapter early! May Newt be in all of your thoughts, and enjoy this bittersweet kiss. I love you all so much!**

 **~Sara**


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay. I haven't updated in a while. I've been going through some mental health issues, but I'm back, so thank you to those who have been patient with me. Ugh I have such writer's block for this story! I think this is getting closer to the end. Also, thanks to the people who followed even though I'm inactive.**

—

He had to save Newt. He had to. That was all Thomas was focused on.

"Tommy?" Thomas heard, as he hit the brakes hard on his motorcycle, not believing what he was hearing.

"Newt?" Thomas' voice came out in a whisper.

"Yeah, Tommy. I'm here." Newt's face broke out into a smile as Thomas dove into his arms, grasping onto his hair and jacket like he would leave if he let go. Newt was here. He was here.

"Wait. What are you doing here? How…how is this possible?" Thomas let go from the embrace, looking into Newt's brown eyes, tears threatening to escape his own.

"It was all a test, Tommy. WICKED forced me to pretend that I had the flare. They gave you the hallucinations. They made you shoot the trigger. It was all just another test to see how your brain would react to it. They're still looking for a cure. They'll always be looking for a cure."

Thomas couldn't believe what he was hearing. WICKED had hurt his best friend, and made him suffer something he would never forget because of it. A new rage filled him at the thought, but Newt read his mind to fast for him to act on it.

"Tommy. Trust me, I'm alright. They can't hurt me anymore."

"How do I know that?"

"Just trust me."

"Newt…" Thomas couldn't get the words out. "Does this mean...that-that you're immune?" He held his breath, waiting for his answer.

"Yeah." He responded.

Then Thomas realized...if Newt had been faking it all along...had he been conscious of the kiss? Even if he was, Newt probably didn't feel the same way. _But what if?_ He thought.

"Hey Tommy?"

"Yeah?"

"You do know that you just said all of that out loud?" Newt started to laugh. Thomas blushed quickly and looked down at his feet.

"I-I can explain-" Thomas began to stutter. _Oh, Thomas._ He thought to himself. _You've ruined everything._

"Just shut up and kiss me already." Newt laughed. Pulling Thomas closer to him.

Thomas has never felt more happy, or more content with anything. He bent his neck down and tilted his head to the side and kissed Newt. He kissed him, forgetting the world around him. All of the problems. The flare, the maze, everything.

He laughed, thinking about how much more simple things would have been if they had just stayed inside that shucking maze. Then again, that whole thing was a fluke too. A flash of doubt ran through Thomas as he realized, what if none of this was even real? What if Newt was still faking it? Doubts crowded his mind, making it feel like he was drowning.

Until a boy pulled him back up into the surface world of happiness, the world with no worries. Newt smiled up at him, making him smile back. Newt was the only thing he had left in this shucking universe, and he wasn't going to let WICKED take away the one thing that brought him happiness.

No, Newt didn't have the flare, Newt wasn't dying. Yes, they had each other.

"We should go back." Thomas said suddenly, thinking about what might have happened to Sonya.

Newt looked at Thomas with worry, and nodded.

—

 **Newt**

I had wanted to tell him so badly. But I couldn't. Otherwise they would've tortured me. But I didn't care anymore. As long as I had Thomas and he had me, we would be fine.

Tommy was my everything. If I thought for one moment about how things could change in any second, and that any one of us could die, it broke my heart. That's why I was focused on right now. How we're going to help everyone.

—

 **Thomas**

Newt and I rushed back to the camp and saw hundreds of corpses littering the ground, some grievers, some gladers. I looked down over to where Newt was and saw him sitting on the ground, weeping where Sonya was.

Then I saw her face. Her lips were blue as if she had suffocated, but not a single mark was on her skin. She was pale as a sheet, and she wasn't breathing. The only other thing that stood out on her body were words carved on her stomach.

 _Do you think you've beaten us? We've only just begun, Stephen._

 _-WICKED_

How dare WICKED carve those words into Sonya! Sonya was one of his friends, someone that he trusted, someone that he had truly cared about.

"Who's Stephen?" Newt asked him.

"It's...me." He let out a choked gasp.

"Tommy, I-

"No, Newt, you shouldn't worry about me. Are you okay?" Thomas asked Newt with concern clear in his eyes.

"Yeah, I'll be alright. Just give me a minute." Newt replied. "You can go."

Thomas took a look at Newt, and then got up to leave.

"We have to find out what they're up to this time, you know." Newt spoke softly with a hand on Thomas' shoulder. "It's not over yet."

"I know." Thomas said. "With you here, it just makes everything easier."

Newt cupped Thomas's face in his hands, and looked straight into his eyes. Thomas seemed to have a certain happiness that Newt had never seen before. Thomas finally had something to live for, because they were happy.

When they kissed, it was like everything else was a blur, and for a moment, they weren't subjects of a cruel experiment or gladers from the maze or leaders. They were just Newt and Thomas. And they were happy.

A loud crash came from behind them, and they turned around to see Minho, who was holding a gun straight at Newt. A feeling of betrayal and anger ran through Thomas when he realized what his so called best friend was trying to do. No. He wouldn't let him.

It was all WICKED's doing. They were making Minho attempt to kill Newt to hurt Thomas even more, just to find a cure.

"Don't do this, Minho." He said softly. "You're better than this."

"If I don't, they're going to kill other people that I care about. They're going to kill all the gladers they haven't killed already because of Newt's betrayal."

"How dare you." Thomas scoffed at Minho in disgust. "Who was there for you the past 2 years in the Maze, huh? Who had your back, and was always there to comfort you? Newt. And this is how you repay him? By pointing a gun at his chest? Killing your best friend is not the way."

"It's the only way." Minho let out a tortured gasp. "Either that or they're going to inject me with a new form of the flare. I-I can't become one of the Gone, Thomas. I just can't." He put the gun back up, aiming and getting ready to fire.

—

 **Hahahahahaaha plot twist! Bet ya didn't see that coming! I've been planning it since day 1. MWAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA. They finally kissssed! Love you all!**

 **~Sarjoo**


	8. Chapter 8

**Helllooooo! Thanks for all of the positive reviews and feedback to the kiss and everything. I just want to reply to one reviewer. Also, I want to apologize for not updating in forever. I've been having some issues with mental health, etc..**

 **Guest:** _ **:wow... so good... I NEED MOREEEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT YOU CANT LEAVE IT LIKE THIS**_ **\- That made me laugh. Lmao. I'm finally updated, so... Chill :) Loved the review**

" _It's the only way." Minho let out a tortured gasp. "Either that or they're going to inject me with a new form of the flare. I-I can't become one of the Gone, Thomas. I just can't." He put the gun back up, aiming and getting ready to fire._

"No, Minho. It's not the only way. Please, not him. Please. Just not him." Thomas begged. "Take me instead. Please."

"I'm supposed to kill him." Minho's expression turned to steel. "Not you." His hands tightened around the trigger, getting ready to pull it.

 _No. I can't lose him. Not again._ Thomas' vision started to blur. _You can't freeze up again. Do something._ So he did. He did what his impulses told him, and just as Minho pulled the trigger, Thomas shoved Newt out of the way and let the bullet pierce his own skin, into his upper arm.

 _At least we're both alive._ Thomas smiled.

"THOMAS!" Newt screamed, running over and throwing his arms around Thomas. "I don't care what happens to me! Don't ever do that to me again. Thomas? Thomas!" The tortured screams of a frightened boy rang through the camp.

Thomas opened his eyes to a frightened Newt who immediately threw his arms around him.

"I'm still here you know." Minho cleared his throat. "Look, I don't wanna do this...I have to." The fear was clear in his eyes. "I just need something from one of you."

"I'll give you anything." Thomas said quickly, his hand clutching the wound in his arm.

"I need your blood, Thomas. It's not the cure, you're...not the cure. But you do have blood cells that can create a new form of the flare that can possibly help against the flare...and have that flare disappear and be replaced by a new one that only immunes can be affected by." Minho stated clearly.

"But how?" Thomas questioned. "How do I know if this isn't a lie either? How do I know if the flare is a real thing? Am I real? Is this another test?"

"Thomas, listen to me. All we need is your blood. We'll leave you alone! We'll even leave Newt alone." The fear was even more evident in his tone. "Please, Thomas. I don't want to die. Newt?"

"I don't even know you anymore, Minho." Was all Newt said.

"Where am I going?" Thomas asked. Newt looked at him as if he was crazy.

"What the bloody hell do you mean, where are you going?" Newt's voice cracked. "You can't leave."

Thomas looked him in the eyes, trying not to let himself break down. "I can't let him kill you. I already lost you once, I can't lose you again."

"Thomas, he might be lying. What if they kill you? Torture you, even? How do you know if he's not going to hurt me later?" Newt pleaded. "We can figure it out together. I can't let you go. I'd rather have him kill me."

Thomas looked at Newt with tortured eyes. "I don't want to go, alright?! I just can't function without you! Do you even know what I went through when you were gone?! I was so depressed…" He remembered his shaking hands, how miserable he was, how the hope and determination in his life came back only when Newt came back.

"And I'm here! You don't have to leave! I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere."

"I'll give you thirty seconds. Decide." Minho threatened, twirling the gun in his hands.

"Newt, I promise that I'll come back, alright?" Thomas whispered into his ear, "I'll break out of there as soon as I can." Newt stared at him as he started to speak. "I'm going." Minho nodded his head towards the truck, leaving Newt behind.

"I'm really sorry, Newt." Minho said, truth behind his words.

 **Couple weeks later…**

They told Thomas that he would be safe. They told Thomas that they would leave him alone. Instead, everyday Thomas had to go through the torture of watching them hurt Newt. His screams echoed through the halls of WICKED, ringing in his ears.

He hadn't seen him, but he knew that voice.

Everyday doctors would come into his cell and do strange tests on him. They would draw out his blood, they would dig through his brain, they would poke and prod at him and hurt him just to see his reaction, but he didn't care.

All he cared about was Newt.

He didn't care if he was being tortured, if he suffered, or if he died. He just wanted them to leave Newt alone. He remembered the words that Newt spoke to him in the day so so long ago, back when he thought that Newt had had the flare.

None of it was real.

It was just a test.

But what if everything else was a test too?

Those were the things that Thomas kept telling himself.

"Thomas, the new FLARE is around 40% done." Said the doctor who's name Thomas had forgotten. He reached deep into his pocket and pulled out a syringe. "Please don't resist, Thomas."

The syringe plunged deep into Thomas' skin. He felt his veins burst on fire. This was the worst physical pain he had ever felt in his life. Every time he started to think about the pain he was in, he just had to think about Newt, and he stopped.

There was so much pain, but what were they doing to Newt? What could they possibly be doing to make him scream like that?

 **Newt**

21 days since Thomas left. He said that he would come back for him, he'd promised...but there was no message, no word. Every single night, Newt would go back into one of the tents in the camp.

He couldn't cry. Not a single tear fell out of his eyes.

He was angry, so angry at Thomas for leaving, but at the same time, he couldn't help but be worried and scared. What if they were hurting him? What if he was…

He stopped thinking and shut all the words out. He just let himself release tortured screams into the air, wondering where in this bloody universe Thomas was.

After he was done, all he could think about was one thing.

 _Tommy, I need you._

 **I'm sorrrrrry for doing this again. I feel like Satan. Anyways, goodbye and I'm going to (hopefully) update sooner next time.**

 **~sarjoo**


	9. Sorry I'm back

**Anonymous: anonymous:I understand the guest's review! WHAT THE BLOODY SHUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING?  
leaving it like that?! REALLY! c'mon son!**

 **Me: *cough* *cough* sorry! Hahahahha I am Satan. I love ur reviews btw if u r the same person haha I APOLOOOOOGIZE.**

 **I've been fucking terrible. I'm sorry for not updating. I am fucking Satan. I haven't updated in months…. I hope you enjoy! It's beennnnn so long. I've read the reviews over and over again, and I'm sorry. Mental health issues came into my way, and I didn't have the energy to write for a while, but hopefully… I'm back. I've definitely improved on my writing during my hiatus! Being suicidal was fun(jkjk), but I don't want to disappoint you guys, so it was really hard to be satisfied with this.**

 **I just want to say happy early newt day, which is why I updated in the first place. I didn't realize that this had 8000+ views.**

 **Hey. So this is the update I've been working on since last November, before my mental health started to decline. Don't worry, I'm back and better than…. never, but I'll be updating at least once a month now. I won't abandon you peoples like some people. Love you!**

 **Thomas**

It was all his fault. Newt might have been better off dead compared to what he was dealing with right now. Was Newt really being tortured in the room next door, or was it something the doctors created to make him comply to what they were saying? And if Newt was alive, how was Thomas even supposed to know if everything that Newt had said to him was true in the first place? Was he really immune, or was that a lie too? Everything was swirling around in his head and he couldn't understand it. How could Newt have possibly faked being shot in the head? What the shuck? How could Newt literally showing symptoms of the flare be possibly explained? Thomas took a deep breath. But was what Minho said true? Was his blood really able to cure the current flare but affect those who were immune?

He thought back to Sonya, and the puddle of blood that Thomas had accidentally left in the WICKED headquarters. Maybe they hadn't killed Sonya the way he thought that they had. Maybe Sonya had been the first test subject of the glare, which was apparently what they called the new flare. That certainly had worked, because Thomas new for a fact that Sonya was immune.

But who would be the little lab rat for round two of the testings? Minho? No… it couldn't be.

Would it be Newt? Thomas ignored the chill that ran through his spine when he thought of what could possibly happen to him, or rather- what might already be currently happening to him.

If Thomas just hadn't left the maze in the first place, then he wouldn't be here. They should've just stayed there and died. Everything was more simple there. How could he have possibly thought that the outside world would be better than the life inside the maze?

On the other hand, maybe Thomas should let them make the glare. It would cure everybody that was currently suffering from the flare and make them better again. There were less immune than not, so the world would go pretty much back to normal. The glare wouldn't be contagious to those who weren't immune to the flare, so it would pretty much be a win-win.

To everybody except for Thomas. He didn't care if they killed him. All he wanted was to see Newt one last time, kiss him and tell him that he was sorry, that he was sorry for all of the time that they would never get to have. Thomas would also tell him to run, run as far away as his feet would let him and get away so that he would never, ever get the glare.

And of course, Thomas would eventually die because they would keep draining his blood and torturing him for more of the cure. Why was he even calling it the virus that could possibly kill the man he was in love with the "cure," anyway?

There was a feeling of something burning in his veins as another doctor who's name he had forgotten started to poke and prod him with differently shaped knives. Although they were just supposed to take his blood, it appeared to him that they were clearly trying their hardest to kill him before they even finished making the glare.

Thomas tried to picture Newts face, because at this point it was the only thing that kept him sane, but when he did, all he could see was Newt's face contorted in pain, screaming and screaming for help that he would never get.

Then came the sounds coming from the room next to him, the screams that were almost identical to Newt's. _Kill me now. Kill him, too. Maybe we're all better off dead then in this place._

 **Newt**

Thomas had made a promise to come back to him. 90 days. He'd been counting them.

Newt could only imagine what they were doing to them there. They were probably ripping him apart and putting him back together just for fun. Newt wanted to see Thomas, he wanted to hold him and tell him that he loved him; tell him that he would be right here waiting for him, whether it took another week or fifty years. He would wait for him, because he didn't go through the maze and everything just to have Tommy ripped away from him.

What if Thomas was already dead? What if the reason that Tommy hadn't come back to him was because he was dead? _No. Nonononoonono._ Newt shook his head. If that was true, then he would have nothing left to live for. Minho betrayed him, Sonya was dead, and if Tommy was gone too… there would be absolutely no point in going through the torture that was life.

To quote Shakespeare- " _Hell is empty and all of the demons are here."_

Newt could just picture them poking and prodding at Tommy, ripping him apart and digging through his organs and filling them with poison, burning him alive or drowning him. He didn't want it to be true, but a feeling in his gut told him that they definitely weren't just taking Thomas' blood.

Maybe everything might have been better if Newt had just actually had the flare and had actually died that night, and if he hadn't been saved by WICKED. He put his head into his hands. Maybe if he'd died that night, Tommy would be on the run. Tommy would be safe, and that was all that mattered to him.

What was the purpose of the new flare if it would just hurt different people rather than cure everybody?

Newt and Thomas were immune. All Newt cared about was Tommy. If they had just hidden away better, if they had just-

If was no use. Tommy was gone, and Newt didn't know where.

But he might know where to find Minho and how to blackmail that son of a bitch.

 **Sorry for the short chapter, but it's better than nothing. :)**


End file.
